Appliance Graveyard
I find myself almost entirely unable to function today. Why, you may ask? No, it’s not further sickness or the antics of those goshdarn cute teenagers. It’s because my house has become the appliance graveyard.
The body count so far is a humidifier (that I truly need in order to breathe air on this planet), a microwave (more on that later), and a coffeemaker that expired just moments before. Add to that my washing machine that is on life support and is just a spin cycle away from flat-lining, and gosh…I don’t even want to know what else is going wrong.
We’re obviously killing our appliances. We’re the Dr. Kevorkians of suburbia. Who would have ever known that repeatedly cooking potatoes in a microwave would cause total system failure? Well, we’ve learned. We know now.
I hate to complain about the lack of appliances since most of the world has…I don’t know…two pots and a dung fire. I grew up out in the country and we didn’t even have air conditioning or cable TV. And yet, my gosh, how spoiled I’ve become by a microwave. Pathetic as it sounds, I’m having to fire up rusty old memory cells to remember how to make a cup of tea without a microwave. Lunch today…hmmm…what’s the best way to heat up leftovers without a microwave? You mean I have to use a pan before dinnertime? Ack!
I see I’ve super-evolved into a suburbanite without survivalist skills. Drop me into a Chinese village and I would expire. Good thing I’ve still got my stove. Just be careful about bringing any of your own appliances to my house. This IS where old washers go to die, after all.
Published by angelawd on December 17th, 2007 tagged Abnormal Motherhood, Time Plus Tragedy Equals...
December 17th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
OH, my. I hope you don’t have any other appliances go kaput. We could probably live without a microwave, but I’m quite certain that our daughters could not!!! Good luck ‘roughing it.’
December 17th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
I don’t know what I’d do without a microwave and a coffeemaker. I’m miles from the nearest Starbucks. Hope your appliances are back in working order soon!
December 17th, 2007 at 1:17 pm
Oh, you poor thing. After that big shitstorm you just went through last week, too!
Right before a Memorial Day party in record-breaking heat, my air conditioner went out. Luckily we were able to get a repair guy out, but because it was a) emergency service, b) a Saturday, and c) a holiday weekend, we paid like crazy for our cold air. Not fun!
December 17th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
We’re good at wrecking things also. I’m working on my stove right now.
December 17th, 2007 at 6:42 pm
It seems like everything at our house always breaks at the same time. Then I’m filled with despair.
December 17th, 2007 at 9:43 pm
tee hee I could never survive without a microwave. Unless all we ever ate was macoroni and ramen noodles.
December 18th, 2007 at 9:49 am
Patty, I feel your pain! I lost my furnace one cold winter morning.
Karen, I think it would be even harder for us to live without a stove…but we replaced that 2 years ago. Right after the dishwasher.
Pamela, it seems that way for us, too. We live in an older home so most of our appliances are at the end of their lifespans.
Sue, that’s so funny. Yesterday the girls were raiding the pantry for lunch and they were actually complaining that macaroni and ramen would take too long to make. What???
December 18th, 2007 at 9:50 am
Markie and Leian, we actually got our microwave to work again, and I bought a new coffeemaker yesterday. Thank goodness! The humidifier is toast, though.