If Jesus was a Dad
It seems to me that the bible doesn’t give me enough examples of parenting a teen. The book of Proverbs offers excellent advice from a parent to a child, but I don’t imagine any child sitting around long enough to hear all of it. Say, for instance, that Jesus had been a dad of a teen. I think I would be helped greatly in my Christian parenting by reading about his examples:
And on the seventh day Jesus calleth his daughter back on her cellphone, and saith, “Verily I say to thee, if you sayest “Whatever” to me and hangeth up on me, you shall live forever as a pillar of salt in the center of town.” And in that place, all the townspeople will gather with great amazement, and the young ones will say, “There goest Little One, a sinner such as I”, and the mothers and fathers will say amongst themselves, “It is good and right that this has happened as a lesson to the children of our loins who might choose to disrespectfully end phone calls with their forefathers.”
Soon after this, Jesus spoke to his daughter, and said, “Though you sayest to me that you have finished all your homework from the day you were absent from school, I lookest into the heart and see the truth is not in you. And so, in the days in which schools break for Springtime, and the semester grades appeareth in the mailboxes, there shall be great rejoicing among the young and lighthearted of the land. But you, however, will rend your clothes and lie on your bed of sorrow, cut off from the friendship of your youth, because of the error of your homework ways. And when I asketh why you have received a ‘C’ in Health class, remember your past transgressions and refraineth from saying to me, “I do not know. The teacher hateth me.”
I think Jesus would have been an excellent parent of teens.
Published by angelawd on February 21st, 2008 tagged Mom of Teens
February 21st, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Yeah, and his Father was pretty good, too. Have you ever seen this? It’s one of my all-time favorites, Laws concerning Food and Drink:
http://wiki.chad.org/wiki?LamentationsOfTheFather
In re cell phones: Our rule is “The convo’s not over till the parent says good-bye.” Violations result in cell-phone confiscation (which includes text message log reading). They’ve gotten much better
February 21st, 2008 at 4:50 pm
Yeah, and his Father was pretty good, too. Have you ever seen this? It’s one of my all-time favorites, Laws concerning Food and Drink:
http://wiki.chad.org/wiki?LamentationsOfTheFather
In re cell phones: Our rule is “The convo’s not over till the parent says good-bye.” Violations result in cell-phone confiscation (which includes text message log reading). They’ve gotten much better
February 21st, 2008 at 6:59 pm
Take away the cellphone. Do not tolerate disrespect. I can handle hatred, but no disrespect. Also, my daughter started behaving better when we drew the line at disrespect (to include eye-rolling, back-turning, slumping, grunting, facial tics, you name it).
February 21st, 2008 at 8:20 pm
First, I hope you are feeling better- at least physically.
Second - I totally agree with Kalynne and Suburb. Disrespect is a deal breaker. If she has to have a phone in case of emergencies, check to see if her phone has a call limits feature. Most of them have some sort of thing where you can specify the numbers she’s allowed to call and/or receive calls from. If yours doesnt’ have it, check in to getting one that does. It is a wonderful tool! they can still call mom, dad, home - but that’s all! Then just cut off the text messaging. It is not a right and she might as well learn that you don’t have to be nice to someone who is being a b… mmm brat.
Hang in there. I’m still PUSHing for you! xoxoxo
February 21st, 2008 at 8:53 pm
Kalynne, that link was hysterical! I’m passing it along.
All, thanks for your concern about my health and experiences with disrespect. I totally agree about forfeiting the phone. However, a pillar of salt on our front lawn seems so much more satisfying, doesn’t it?
February 22nd, 2008 at 10:47 am
Awww Angela, I’m sorry. And I’m right back to square one with mine…again. She left this time because we wouldn’t extend her night with friends….so nearly a week later, we have no idea where she is and we have now power to find her. Angela, I don’t know your daughter but I do know this–you have this small window of opportunity to do something to turn it around. After that your power will be gone and once your daughter knows this, I hope she doesn’t react to it. More prayers said for you and your daughter, I’d love to see a happy ending even if mine hasn’t been.
Me, I just have to find a way to live with this, and I think that’ll be the hardest part. I have to move on and raise my boys, be my husband’s wife and be a friend to my friends. I haven’t done the best job lately, so it’s time. xo
February 22nd, 2008 at 11:01 am
Stacey, I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. I’m sure you must be filled with worry, even though she is God’s child. I will be praying that God takes away your pain about this situation and gives you the strength to keep going.
Thanks for the reminder about how all I have is today with Jenn. I get so frustrated that I miss the beauty and the moments we do have. And I’m grateful to all my blogging friends who have reinforced my backbone about her disrespect!
Remember, your story is not over yet, and there is still time for a happy ending!
February 22nd, 2008 at 11:10 am
OK, I’m trying to be sympathetic about your disrespectful teen but I’m laughing too hard. “The teacher hateth me?” My kids have actually said that.
February 22nd, 2008 at 11:12 am
Whoops! What I meant was, my kids claim the teacher hates them and therefore gives them bad grades. They don’t actually speak in Old English words.
February 22nd, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Amen, Sister. I love the “children of our loins” line. It reminded me of one time at Mass when the reader mispronounded it and read, fruit of your lions. Grrr.
March 2nd, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Thanks for submitting a great article to the March 2008 Mom’s Blogging Carnival. You can see your story and all the others at:
http://www.gogirlfriend.com/reviews/moms-blogging-carnival-2-7760