I don’t belong here.
I’ve come to realize over the past few years that I am almost entirely surrounded by Christians in my friendships, family, and neighborhood, and it feels good. Too good, in fact. I’m not supposed to be here.
God calls Christians to be out in the world, loving and helping non-believers. When we get together with believers, it is for support and growth. However, I find that since I’m almost always around people who believe basically the same things that I do, it’s easy for me to think everybody thinks the way I do. In fact, it gets hard to understand why people would even want to believe anything else.
Since I stumbled into the world of blogging, I have been blessed to come across many other perspectives and ways of living. I have truly been enriched by this, although I’ve also been irritated, angry, and saddened by what I read. But I don’t belong in just the comfortable world of the Christian commmunity. I am commissioned to be out in the world.
The bible says, “Always be ready to give an explanation for the hope that you have.” But how can I talk meaningfully with a non-believer when I don’t even know how they think, or why they believe what they believe? To that end, I’d like to invite anyone who wants to enrich their understanding of “the rest of the world” to check out the site Religious Tolerance. If we are going to be truly Christlike, we need to join in dialogues that foster some sort of understanding; God does not desire that we become polarized into our own views.
Read; think; engage. Expose yourself to different perspectives and seek to understand, even if you don’t accept or believe the same things. Your faith is strong enough to weather a different point of view.
Update: Sadly, I had to remove the link to a blog site I initially recommended. Instead, I’ve linked to a religious tolerance website that offers a great deal of food for thought - and respectful, compassionate fellow writers. Happy reading!
Published by angelawd on March 28th, 2008 tagged Daily Christianity
March 29th, 2008 at 12:43 am
Angela - your last line is what will stay with me.
March 29th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
I’m glad, Mary! Thanks for reading.
March 31st, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Angela, our pastor is always thinking like this, you’d probably like him tons. He’s always telling us to go out and be Jesus to others –that’s quite a commission indeed. Very thought provoking post.
March 31st, 2008 at 2:52 pm
You’re right, Stacey, it’s a hard commission, and sometimes painful. Your pastor sounds great!
March 31st, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Wow, Angela! That was quite a dialogue you had over there at “The Skin I’m In” - I read it all.
Would now be a good time to make a confession? I’ve been reading your blog for several months now. I really enjoy your writing and especially the teenager stuff because that’s one big thing we have in common.
I also learn from reading your Christian postings. However (here’s the confession), I am not a Christian. I was raised Methodist, but in my early 20’s I came to reject organized religion. After about 10 years of not attending church I realized one day that over those 10 years I had developed my own spirituality. I’m a constant reader, and reading about different faiths and viewpoints was something I did a lot of during those 10 years. Slowly, but surely, my spirituality evolved and took hold. I won’t go into all the details here for brevity’s sake, but suffice it to say my spirituality is largely rooted in Buddhism and Judeo/Christian teachings now. I attend church now - Unitarian Universalist - quite regularily and love the support I receive there to follow my heart and develop my spirit.
I have one other confession - a while back you had a post about a day trip you and your husband took to a quaint village somewhere, and how you were virtually paralyzed when you realized you were in a Wiccan store. Your husbands comment, I think, was that he didn’t like the thought that his money was supporting the devil’s work. I am NOT Wiccan, but I was so angered by that comment. I have friends who are Wiccan, and they are not devil worshippers - far from it. Their religion is earth centered. They are good people and are not evil in any way shape of form. I think on a later posting you said your husband wanted to try and reach out the next time instead of turning and running. I just want to take this opportunity now that I’m coming clean with you that I wholeheartedly encourage you to do so. There is so much love in the world, not just in the Christian form. Therein lies the true beauty of this world!
So, now that I’ve confessed, I hope you’ll still visit my blog and continue to dialogue with me.
March 31st, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Hi Julia, I’m pleased to meet you! I’ve been reading your blog for a while, too. I’m glad you’ve been enjoying my posts like I have yours.
I’m fascinated by your blending of beliefs in Buddhism and Judeo-Christian teachings. I would love to hear more about what you believe and how you live that out in daily life. I don’t know a whole lot about Buddhism but I do admire the message of peace and personal growth - plus, I’ve heard it’s the only major religion that has never been a factor in a war.
Thanks for seeing beyond my husband’s knee-jerk reaction in the Wiccan store to his later realization that he needed to seek to understand others. Just like my husband, my first reaction is not always my best, but when I stop and think and try to listen to God’s guidance, I make a less flawed decision. I have read a little about the Wiccan faith and do distinguish it from Black Witchery, and there are aspects of that belief system that are absolutely lovely. Like I said in this post, we can’t separate ourselves from the world or avoid people who believe differently than us. In fact, I think we’re enriched by getting to know different people, while we foster hatred and suspicion when we isolate.
I sure do appreciate your comments! Stay in touch!
April 1st, 2008 at 3:16 am
Angela,
I wanted to take this opportunity to express that although we don’t see eye to eye, I thought the point in our interaction was to learn from each other, or at least find a common ground where we could respect one another regardless of views.
You have treated me as if I am clueless to the people and practices involved in Christianity. Like mentioned, I grew up in a Christian household, and in fact never even knew a non-Christian until adulthood; therefore, I have been in similar shoes to yours at one time. I am not ignorant to Christian teachings, beliefs or ideologies. I have spent my entire life surrounded by it each and every day. Far more importantly than the study I mentioned, much of what I discussed on my blog I speak from personal experience. As I’ve stated, it would be ridiculous and unfounded for me (or anyone) to say that all people of any one religion act in exactly the same way. Christianity, especially, has many different interpretations. But, unfortunately, I know there is a lot of corruption within Christianity, as in any major organization, and it certainly does not serve God’s purpose to turn a blind eye to it. By adulthood, we all should know that what looks like a sheep, isn’t always a sheep. Wolves many times hide just below the woolly surface.
I personally believe that good Christians are simply good people who practice Christianity. I do not believe Christianity “makes” a person good. So we both believe in the chicken and the egg, we just disagree about which comes first.
My message has ALWAYS been that I wish for more compassion and tolerance (in fact I suspect you got the link for religioustolerance.org from my site); however, I sadly see the opposite ring true from much of the Christian population. For this very reason, my own family doesn’t know that I have discontinued labeling myself as a Christian. I fear the misunderstandings or arguments I would likely receive. Although my family is very loving, you tell me, would you graciously accept the fact if one of your daughters decided to no longer practice Christianity?
Although, I no longer label myself religious, I am no less compassionate or concerned about the state of humanity and goodness. I, like your previous commenter, relate better to the philosophies of Buddhism.
I feel you have been greatly misleading and unfair in your accusation that I became abusive and irrational. Abusive? Irrational? Because you didn’t like my position? That is a very strong contention to throw around. I implore you to tell me exactly what I said that was abusive. You and I both willingly engaged in a civilized, albeit uncomfortable, discussion. If you felt abused by an irrational person, why do you continue to return to my blog time and again to be “argumentative” (your word) even as recently as a couple of hours ago? If you are the righteous and thoughtful person you say you are, you need to look into your heart and evaluate the virtue in spreading such hurtful and inflammatory and most importantly, unfounded, remarks. We ought remember that God sees the contempt behind insidious words.
April 1st, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Hi Angela,
Thanks for the comment back. Someday maybe I’ll tackle my faith on my blog to give people a deeper understanding, but it is a constantly evolving thing - the more I read, the more it evolves. The basics being that it is earth/people centered. Peace and Love are paramount. But, I also recognize great teachers, such as Jesus. I celebrate Christmas not as the coming of the son of God, but more as the reverance of a great human being, possibly one of the greatest, who taught the lessons I strive to learn and incorporate into my everyday life - such as peace, compassion, love, joy, etc…
I see “The Skin I am In” blogged here now. I know this has probably been uncomfortable for you, and her, but I have to tell you I have been reading it with enthusiasm. For the most part, the dialogue has been respectful, and I truly enjoy the sharing of concepts that has been going on. I wish she wouldn’t have deleted your posts, I think we can all learn from one another through this kind of sharing and dialogue. Its really a shame she took yours down, even though I more closely align with her ideas and appreciated her blog greatly, it’s the ensuing dialogue that really gets your mind pulsing and thinking. Her deletion forces me to ask why she felt the need to delete them. Did she find them too contrary or threatening? I’m perplexed, and will probably never know. But it won’t stop me from reading her blog in the future. She’s an excellent writer, as are you, and I appreciate you both putting yourselves out there from which the rest of us can learn!
April 1st, 2008 at 4:04 pm
BE, the discussion we had on your blog went in an unproductive direction, and I’m truly sorry for that. I apologize if I’ve made you (or your readers) angry or hurt your feelings. I’ve taken down the “abusive and irrational” label from my blog and will let your words speak for themselves. You are an excellent writer and you express your thoughts well.
Because my words and motives were so deeply misunderstood on your blog, I’ve removed my comments.
Thank you for all you have taught me, and thanks for the link to the religious tolerance site.
April 1st, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Julia, I actually removed my comments from BE’s site myself. Though I was trying to sincerely and respectfully foster a dialogue of understanding, my words and motives were badly misunderstood. Some readers felt I was writing with “smug superiority” and “insidious hypocrisy”. If people are reading that into my words, my comments are causing more harm than good, and God is not glorified. I thought it was better just to take them down.
I’d love to hear more about how your faith and beliefs are evolving. I think it would make a great blog series! What’s the best spiritual book you’ve read lately? I’m reading a book on comparative world religions. It’s a good basic study, though it does slant in favor of Protestant Christianity.
April 1st, 2008 at 4:19 pm
Dear angelawd,
I am very impressed with how you handled this situation. I was glad to see you removed your comments not BE. It humbles me the way you honored The Blogger Exposed. Keep up the awesome writing!!
April 1st, 2008 at 4:31 pm
Thanks, Josie! I’m glad my comment reads with the same intention as I wrote it. I am hoping she feels honored and respected by my words.
Haven’t seen you around here lately. Glad you’re back responding!
April 8th, 2008 at 12:15 am
Angela - you have a good heart. And in the end, isn’t that what we are all truly striving for?
Loved this post. It is always good to see that people can still dicuss without fighting. xoxoxo
April 12th, 2008 at 11:16 pm
Angela: “God calls Christians to be out in the world, loving and helping non-believers. […]
Since I stumbled into the world of blogging, I have been blessed to come across many other perspectives and ways of living. I have truly been enriched by this, although I’ve also been irritated, angry, and saddened by what I read. But I don’t belong in just the comfortable world of the Christian commmunity. I am commissioned to be out in the world.”
Hi Angela,
I’ve been reading some of your posts here as well as the comments. I’m an ex-Christian, who has been blogging for a few years. I don’t seek any religious belief or system of faith and I guess you could call me an agnostic, but I’d like to say that I can relate to your anger, irritation and saddness. I get the same emotional reactions when I read some Christian blogs and their assumptions about atheists, agnostics, secularists, humanists &/or whateverists.
Since leaving Christianity, I wonder, how do I continue to relate to my still Christian friends, when I know they simply can no longer relate to me? Perhaps it is best not to cause them further angst. Yet, we must live in this world together. I don’t see religion ever going away.
I would like to see a world where Christians stopped thinking that we “non-believers” need their help, because of our so-called “non-belief.” What kind of help do we need? Salvation from hell? Is that the kind of help we need? Is that how you see it?
Since leaving Christianity, I’ve met so many Christians that don’t even believe in hell. I’m an ex-conservative evangelical/fundamentalist. Finding Christians who don’t believe in hell was an interesting discovery. (My past Christian grouping called these kind of Christians, heretics or never saved in the first place.)
They are easier to relate to because they aren’t “helping” us because we are non-believers who need to be saved from hell. They are fellow human beings that just happen to have a belief system and are interested in being fellow citizens on this planet, who love, care, share, struggle, hurt and seek peace together.
Many non-Christians/non-believers take offense perhaps to the suggestion that Christians should be out helping them, because they somehow or other must need it, being “non-believers” and all. To tell you the truth, many Christians need help themselves and what do you think the chances are that they’d receive help from a non-believer?
The world is filled with many “non-believers” who are kind, compassionate, caring human beings, moral, ethical and all around you, but we aren’t always so vocal about our non-belief. In a world filled with theism, we don’t always speak up. Sometimes it feels safer to stay on our own blogs, however, I too have a personal commission born out of a sense of our common humanity to be out in the world sharing my good news, that people can and do live outside faith communities, leave faith-based systems and live without a belief in a specific “God” quite nicely.
And trust be, I’ve been around for many a Christian who calls me brainwashed and deluded. Those would be the nice terms used to describe me. Who knows, maybe more then a few “non-believers” would same the same thing about me.
I hope you don’t mind me sharing yet another perspective.
April 14th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Zoe, I really do appreciate your perspective. Sorry it’s taking so long to respond - we’re dealing with a serious illness in the family.
Since reaching out and reading about different beliefs, my eyes have been opened to how insulting and frustrating it can be to have a Christian tell you you’re lost or need help. That certainly was a blind spot for me!
Since you have an evangelical Christian background, I’m sure you remember the bible’s “great Commission” - that Christians are supposed to go out and spread their good news to the world. Now, I’m not one of those people knocking on doors and throwing religious literature at people - I’m just simply talking about what I believe when the topic comes up. For the first time in my life, I’m considering how I can do that without being an irritant or insulting people that I just want to help or encourage. And I’m also considering how to distinguish between people who truly are lost and struggling with life who might be helped by my perspective, from those who are perfectly satisfied with what they believe and don’t feel the need for any other beliefs.
I agree with you that people become very touchy and sometimes hurtful when talking about religion. I have met many people who have been hurt by Christianity. But I have a lot of scars from non-Christians, too!
I sure would like to discuss beliefs with people who have different ideas and are interested in reaching out, too. I would hate to think that religious and non-religious people have no way to relate to each other - how can that be possible? Yet, we allow ourselves to be separated, and lose out on the wisdom and support we have to offer each other.
So…thanks for reaching out to me, and I hope maybe you and I can learn from each other!
April 15th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
No apology needed Angela.
Warm thoughts and gentle hugs for you all during this difficult time.